The Boiler Room? No thanks!

November 16, 2009 at 11:53 5 comments

I went to St. James Power Station for the first time on Saturday (yeah, yeah, where have I been?) and left with a very bad taste in my mouth. Corona wanted to go to The Boiler Room because of their live band, so there we went.

The best thing about it was the 50% off drinks till nine. No quibbles about that. I liked having my Absolut Vanilla and Don Julio, both on the rocks (which is how I prefer my poison, in case anyone’s buying), at single-digit prices.

It wasn’t the obvious inexperience of the bartenders, who “had to check with the manager” that the advertised happy-hour rates did indeed apply at eight-forty-five pm. The experience-gaining process usually involves much floundering in embarrassment.

No, it was the blatant meanness of the night’s live act that did it for me. The mean bit was preceded by five bum-shaking guys and gals taking turns to sing ballads from the past two decades. They did it moderately well.

And then one of the bum-shaking guys stepped up to become the emcee. He received a request from a hen party to invite the bride-to-be onstage for what I assumed to be a spot of good-natured ribbing. My assumption was wrong. The ribbing was not at all good-natured.

Let me give you an example.

Bride-to-be – let’s dub her Penny – goes onstage. She left home in T-shirt, jeans and sandals, but has acquired a veil and an electric-blue boa, thanks, presumably, to the hen party. Poor girl.

Emcee: Oh wow, look at you!

Emcee’s partner: (trying to be helpful) Isn’t she beautiful?

Emcee: (snorts loudly) Come awwwwnn! Pretty – OK. But beautiful? BULLSHIT!!!

Drummer executes drum roll to cue laughter.

Excuse me?

I tried not to listen as it plodded on painfully. But the next bit got my attention.

Emcee: Penny, tell us – ARE YOU A VIRGIN?

Penny: Uh. Yes.

Emcee: I don’t believe you! I’m gonna test! (Sucks his finger slowly, removes it from his mouth, and sticks it up in the air) If this finger doesn’t go in, you’re telling the truth. If it goes in uninterrupted, you’re lying. And if this can go in (makes a fist)… THEN YOU’RE A SLUT!!!

Drummer executes drum roll to cue laughter.

Right there and then I decided that I had missed absolutely nothing in not coming here before, and that I was never coming back to this sick and sorry place. 

The emcee never seemed to think for a moment that he was anything other than witty and magnetic. He never apologized to Penny for the horrible trash he spewed, and never checked to see if she was happy with how she was being treated. In fact, these were his parting words as she finally left the stage.

Emcee: Oh, and I luuurve your sandals. But next time, girl, make sure that you paint your toenails first, OK?

I fail to understand what my two friends see in this dump. It only made me angry, and possibly slightly deaf. I should have just gone and spent my evening reading my new Terry Pratchett. There ain’t gonna be a next time.

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Entry filed under: Dear Diary. Tags: , , , .

Bag o’ tricks The Longchamp monster

5 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Monty  |  November 16, 2009 at 21:59

    Poor girl….but then, I refuse to go to a place that has an age limited for ladies night. So…can I borrow your Terry Pratchett when you are done?

    Reply
    • 2. Katie  |  November 16, 2009 at 23:17

      Oh, so this is the age-limit place? Two marks, then, in my can-go-to-hell book.

      Of course you can borrow the Pratchett. Unseen Academicals. I didn’t even know it was out till I walked past it in Borders!

      Reply
  • 3. kel  |  November 17, 2009 at 00:39

    there are all kinds of people out there – one category be the ones who think that they are so funny and should be worshipped.. lewd and LC as the stuff they say. sadly and scarily, i see these streaks even at young tender ages of 17, 18..

    Reply
    • 4. Katie  |  November 17, 2009 at 12:10

      Actually, bad as it is, I find it more excusable in youngsters. They at least can claim the defence of inexperience and ignorance. This emcee dude was well into his thirties! I guess it’s up to the individual – ourselves included – to make a difference or at least make a choice. It’s not cool to publicly humiliate someone just to get a few weak laughs.

      Reply
      • 5. kel  |  November 18, 2009 at 03:14

        guess u’re right.. i suppose the kids need to be told it’s not right at least once. so hopefully they don’t become like this dude.

        maybe this dude can claim defence of alcohol-influence..

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Welcome to my blog!


My blog-name is Katie but I will not respond if you call me that in real life because it's not my real name. Yes, I do practise virtual-world paranoia. No, I do not enjoy stalkers. But I do enjoy writing and having folks reading said writing, so welcome to my world. It's nice to meet you.

Playing in my head over and over again argh

I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song (Jim Croce)

Book(s) of the moment

Hogfather (Terry Pratchett)

Books read in 2010 and 2011

Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows (JK Rowling) - 'cos the movie's coming out!
Frankenstein: Lost Souls (Dean Koontz) - ah, bugger, it's part of a series! Now I hafta find all the books...
Dismantled (Jennifer McMahon) - oh, good one
Tigerlily's Orchids (Ruth Rendell)
Shutter Island (Dennis LeHane) - reminds me too much of work
Holy Fools (Joanne Harris) - it's official: I prefer her scary books
A Series of Unfortunate Events; The Unauthorized Autobiography; The Beatrice Letters (Lemony Snicket)
The Little Friend (Donna Tartt)
The main books - 11 so far - of the Southern Vampire series; the Aurora Teagarden series except for A Fool & His Honey - that makes it 7; Sweet & Deadly (Charlaine Harris)
The Woman in Black (Susan Hill)
Full Dark, No Stars (Stephen King)
Room: A Novel (Emma Donaghue)
Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children (Ransom Riggs)
The Bachman Books (Stephen King)
Men At Arms (Terry Pratchett)
Carpe Jugulum (Terry Pratchett)
The Fifth Elephant (Terry Pratchett)
Beauty (Robin McKinley)
The Sandman, Vol 1 (Neil Gaiman)
The Burden (Agatha Christie) - her crime novels are waaay better
Snuff (Terry Pratchett)

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